5 years/19 weeks

There just aren't words to describe how I feel today. I've had the joy and privilege to be married to Paul for five years today. We don't do a lot for anniversaries as a general rule - no elaborate vacations or anything, but each one is very special to both of us and this one really has me thinking. With the little dude on the way (19 weeks today, sorry no pic), it's time for us to do some rearranging of our house, and our life in general (one of the reasons I still haven't blogged pics from our vacation). I am going through each closet and room and getting rid of things we don't need. One of the major projects is the photos - as you can imagine we have a LOT, and particularly of my family/me since I inherited all my parents' stuff (lots of duplicates and ugly pics of me and kat in college have found their way to the trash bin). It's been eyeopening to see all those old pictures of when P and I first met - just children really. The horrible haircuts, the heinous fashions, the sparsely furnished apartments. It reminds me of how far we have come, and that we've done it together.

Then there's our wedding day. I remember it with much fondness. So many of you were there, helping us. We were among the first in our close group to get married and it all felt like a whirlwind (weddings always do for the bride and groom, it seems). I remember how fun it was, how hard we worked to make it all happen, the wonderful people that were there, the excitement, and the nerves. We were both nervous that day - not because of the commitment. Just the chaos of it all, and in front of so many people! I remember my heart swelling with pride as we walked back down the aisle, my mind blissfully free of any trouble we'd ever face (or had already dealt with) or changes we'd undergo.

And now, with a few years behind us and hopefully tons more ahead, I feel more confident than ever about who I am and where I belong. I feel more pride and love than I thought I could, and I look enthusiastically toward the future which will undoubtedly not be easy, but will all be worth it and tolerable with Paul by my side. He may not take out the trash, but I am no model wife either. And that isn't what matters, though things like that are the annoyances that most often get expressed. So this year, I know we will fight and have disagreements - we'll both be short on sleep and high on stress. But I will do my absolute best to do a better job of showing my appreciation through my actions, rather than with my words.

I love you, Paul, and I'm so proud to be your wife.



P.S. DAMN all of you whose wedding pictures are digital! I don't have the pics I want to post because they aren't SCANNED. How LAME is that. WE ARE GETTING THOSE NEGATIVES PUT ON CD THIS YEAR. And yes, we have been saying that for 5 years.